Boy: I’ll pay you 10 bucks to climb up the flagpole.

Girl: ok. (climbs the flagpole)

Girl: Mommy Mommy a boy paid me 10 bucks to climb the flagpole.

Mom: He just wanted to see your underwear!

…Next Day…(Same boy): I’ll pay you 20 BUCKS to climb the flagpole!

Girl: OK thanks! (climbs the flagpole)

Girl: Mommy Mommy today the boy paid me 20 BUCKS for climbing the flagpole, but today I tricked him this time I wasn’t wearing underwear

A man is driving with his wife

A man is driving with his wife at his side and his mother-in-law in the backseat.

The women just won’t leave him alone.

His mother-in-law says, “You’re driving too fast!”

His wife says, “Stay more to the left.”

After ten mixed orders, the man turns to his wife and asks,

“Who’s driving this car – you or your mother?”

A man took his pregnant wife to hospital

A man took his pregnant wife to the hospital.

The doctor looked her over and told them it would be a rather difficult delivery.

He offered to let the couple try an experimental procedure.

The woman would be connected to a machine that would transfer part of the pain to the father of the baby, thus reducing her own.

The man quickly agreed. The doctor warned him, though, that there was a slight bug in the machine that caused it to amplify the pain sent to the father by ten times,

and if the pain became too much for to bear would he please let the doctor know.

The doctor turned on the machine and watched the man.

The man said he felt absolutely fine and he could take more.

The doctor turned the dial up to 40, 60, 80, and finally 100% of the pain, times ten.

The woman delivered the baby painlessly and the doctor stared at the man,

astonished at how he could not even flinch with that much pain brought upon him.

The couple took the new baby home. There, on the front step, the mailman lay dead.