Jenny had married Roger, a man much older than her.
Concerned about his health, she decided they should have separate bedrooms after the wedding to ensure he didn’t over-exert himself.
That night, after the celebrations, Jenny got ready for bed. Soon, there was a knock at her door.
It was Roger, her 85-year-old groom, ready for some romantic time together.
They enjoyed their time, and Roger left. Jenny was about to fall asleep when she heard another knock. To her surprise, it was Roger again, full of energy.
They spent more time together, and he left once more.
Just as she settled in, there was yet another knock. Roger, as lively as ever, was back for a third round. Jenny laughed and went along with it again.
Afterward, she looked at Roger in amazement. “I’m so impressed!”
she said. “At your age, you’ve got more stamina than men a third your age. You’re incredible!”
Roger paused, looking puzzled. “Wait,” he said. “You mean I’ve been here before?”
Better than money
A man was walking down the street when he was accosted by a particularly dirty and shabby-looking homeless man who asked him for a couple of dollars for dinner.
The man took out his wallet, extracted ten dollars and asked, “If I give you this money, will you buy some beer with it instead of dinner?”
“No, I had to stop drinking years ago,” the homeless man replied.
“Will you use it to go fishing instead of buying food?” the man asked.
“No, I don’t waste time fishing,” the homeless man said. “I need to spend all my time trying to stay alive.”
“Will you spend this on greens fees at a golf course instead of food?” the man asked.
“Are you NUTS!” replied the homeless man. “I haven’t played golf in 20 years!”
“Will you spend the money on a woman in the red light district instead of food?” the man asked.
“What disease would I get for ten lousy bucks?” exclaimed the homeless man.
“Well,” said the man, “I’m not going to give you the money. Instead, I’m going to take you home for a terrific dinner cooked by my wife.”
The homeless man was astounded. “Won’t your wife be furious with you for doing that? I know I’m dirty, and I probably smell pretty disgusting.”
The man replied, “That’s okay. It’s important for her to see what a man looks like after he has given up beer, fishing, golf, and s*.*x.”
Two hunters are out in the woods
Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses.
He doesn’t seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed.
The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services.
He gasps, “My friend is dead! What can I do?”.
The operator says “Calm down. I can help. First, let’s make sure he’s dead.”
There is a silence, then a shot is heard.
Back on the phone,