1st joke:— Three Nuns Are Talking
3 nuns are talking and the first nun says,
“u would never believe what i discovered.”
intrigued, the other to signal her to continue.
” i found a phone in the priests room.”
said the first nun.
“oh thats nothing said the second one,
i found c*ndo.ms in one of his drawers.”
said the second one.
” what did u do with them.”
said the first nun.
pridefully the second nun responds with,
” i poked holes in all of them.”
and the third nun says, “oh sh!*t…”
2nd joke: He rubbed it and a genie came
A man was walking down the beach when he noticed a cave.
He walked in and looked around only to discover a magic lamp buried in the sand.

He rubbed it and a genie came out and said, “You may have 3 wishes but whatever u wish for all the lawyers in the world will get double.”
The man agreed and said, “I want a million dollars.”
He got that and the lawyers got 2 million.
Next he said, “I want a Ferrari.” So he got one and all the lawyers got 2. Next, being his last wish, he took a minute and thought about it carefully.
Finally he said,” Well I’ve always wanted to give a kidney.”