Every workplace has rules that employees must follow, but sometimes these rules can cross personal boundaries. Recently, a woman shared her concerns about being confronted for choosing her comfort at work. This issue sparked mixed opinions among people.
A woman started her story by mentioning the case as “the most absurd controversy that I have been involved in”.
“Day 1 of my new job. I wear a sweater and pants to work. I do not wear a b^a. I have never worn a b*a for two years at my previous job, and nobody has ever brought it up. I obviously have not been wearing a b*a at home for the past year, during lockdown. I hate b*as, I find them very uncomfortable and unnecessary”, she imparted details.
“Two people come up to me during the day, and say that what I’m wearing is inappropriate and that I should wear a b*a to work. This is a new job, I don’t even know any of these people. I’m literally wearing a sweater, you can’t see anything, I’m all covered up. You can’t see anything except the shape of my breast, I guess. One woman literally told me these words, as she was complaining about my clothes. I have large boobs, but I feel that what I’m wearing is completely normal.”
She continued with her narrative about what happened the next day: “Day 2 of my new job. I do not wear a b*a, but I wear a T-shirt and a jacket on top of that. I am dressed even more conservatively than day 1. Two more people give me similar criticisms again. One of them is the secretary of my supervisor, so this is getting serious. I mention to her that the office literally has no dress code, and that employees can wear what is comfortable. She says that there is still an unspoken etiquette to be followed. She also mentioned that the shape of my boobs were clearly visible”.
A woman finished her story with the question, hoping to get a view from the side: “For the two years I spent at my prev office, I did not wear a b8a once. I usually wore sweaters or T-shirts or blouses, most of the time, along with a jacket. Even though I may have large breasts, I did not see it as inappropriate or a problem. Am I wrong here?”
Some users expressed their concern about is it worth to fight for the rights on the first days of the job.
Employers can not mandate what kind of undergarments their employees choose to wear. There are a few exceptions, but an office setting is not one. But, I can say that if this annoys your boss enough, they will magically find another reason to let you go. You’re not even past your probation period. They don’t NEED a reason to let you go. Try finding a sports b*a. Something with no wire and is relatively comfortable. Something that doesn’t squish you. That’s just a suggestion, though.
“I am afraid that even if you do not see it as inappropriate, your new workplace does. To the extent that 4 people over 2 days have said something to you. That was your supervisor sending a message via the secretary, by the way. You will get fired or let go if you continue to not wear something. Can you wear a b*alette, crop top b*a, comfort b*a/sleep b^a, or similar?”
Going to HR to pick up this fight on day 3 is begging to not see the end of the month. OP is not going to win this, she will not show compliance asking questions, she will show compliance by complying. Many attire compromises were suggested. If no peace can be found, she will lose her job, end of story. No company takes any hassle from a person hired last week, unless perhaps the person is the CEO himself. She is NTA, but has a decision to make. Whether having to make this decision is fair (I think it is not) is beside the point.
“Women’s breasts should be normalized, but society isn’t there yet, and it is usually very noticeable. Overall, I’m saying you’re not wrong because it should be normal, but I understand it making people uncomfortable because it’s not yet. If I were you, I would wear sports b*as/b*alettes/camis just to keep the peace since it’s a new workplace, and you don’t want to be starting on the wrong foot.”
“If there is no dress code, do what you want, but also it’s in their rights to want a certain level of professionalism.”
“It’s ridiculous that people are this upset over your boobs and how you choose to dress when there’s not even a dress code. Sounds like they have a staring problem, I’m sure HR would love to hear about it.”
And some found her concerns ridiculous and wrong, taking the side of the company.
“It doesn’t matter what happened at your last job you’re not there any longer, you’re at a new job. If you really can’t handle wearing a b*a, you’re going to have to look for a new job, sue this company so you can not wear one, or go back to your old company.”
“You’re wrong for pretending not to know that most professional workplaces consider a b*a part of professional attire. If you want to go against that norm, you do you, but if you have anything but A-cup breasts, people are gonna notice.”
The story shows that the woman’s outfit choice and preference not to wear a b*a isn’t just about comfort or fashion. It’s about personal freedom and challenging workplace norms. Her decision might lead to change or simply stress the importance of respecting different views. This highlights the need for ongoing talks about inclusivity and acceptance in all areas of life.